A thought crossed my mind today. If, you were lying on your deathbed and before closing your eyes, you could see just one image of the past in your mind, what would that be? Would it be your most depressed moment? Happiest? An image of your family or friends? Something, more like, out of an old sepia-tinted photograph?
I made several attempts to visualise the scenario and seek the answer. To those who ask if this is really necessary, all I can say is perhaps, the exercise is a chance to prepare myself for the inevitable, whenever that maybe.
While questions linger, and as I ponder over them, I'm drawn to the word - Happiest. Prejudice? Possibly. I can't say, at this point in time, if this state of mind has either come and gone or yet to, in my life. If it is the former, then did I ever realise it? Strange, being aware makes you happier than (that moment itself, called) happiest! If it has not come my way, then would I recognise it when it does?
And what is this happiness? Such a relative-relative term. Like all other emotions. Such an unquantifiable and intangible entity. And happiest? How can you possibly measure happiest-ness? Recollect all those moments when you clutched your tummy, rolled on the floor, got your intestines knotted, experienced those tingly sensations? And well, ask yourself now, do you remember what made you behave so animatedly? Else the way you felt while sitting by the side of the window, at night, watching the purple hues of the sky... or the silent drizzle highlighted by a row of sodium vapour lamps? Bliss? There could be a gazillion ways to feel happy. In my opinion, to "realise" is, perhaps, the greatest. You could have a mental picture associated with it. But how many realisations in a lifetime and which one would rein supreme? And the corresponding image? This brings me back to my question.
Worse (or better!), am asking myself - Do you have to even think of such a moment? It may not exist after all. You could just pass away in your sleep and not know anything! Saves you from all the trouble, eh? Lol!
Having that perfect wedding... in Chennai...
6 years ago
4 comments:
Is this the after effect of THE GUITAR????
i cant even imagine what i would visualize at that moment...!!! probably the laundry sitting undone, or a book to be returned in the lib, or something inane like that!!!:P
Actually, if death was to give us a notice of a time with a millsecond accuracy, we vain human beings will plan our departure from this planet in whatever fashion we want to imagine. :)
But, the irony is death does not announce itself most of the occasions. Maybe when you are totally in the collapsing death bed and you know you might pass out anytime. I am not sure if you can still hold on to one image and stay quiet. I think, most people feel nothing before they die. It would feel like a confusion. Something they never experienced before. :D
Happiness is the only pursuit for which we suffer. But somehow our suffering consumes our happiness. It is a huge vicious circle of an endless chase. But some times i am content with the feeling that the pursuit and the enduring of the suffering itself becomes happiness rather than defining a moment or an end result. :)
Nice flow of a blog you wrote. Excellent. It is rare to see people writing thoughts. Most people are slowly aiming to become human wikipedias giving extreme importance to factual and politically correct statements rather than writing their thoughts and feelings.
Glad!
PS: GG also can be Glistening Garden. :D
Random Traveller has put it more realistic :)
@ Aaartz
Laundry?! I think library is more like it ;)
'The Guitar' wasn't exactly running through my mind when I wrote the post, though I can't say if it did in fact, sub-consciously! :)
@ Peru
>> It would feel like a confusion. Something they never experienced before. :D
Well said, bud! A twinge of despair, mayhem and some asphyxiation. Hmm.. No wonder nobody wants to get there.
Thanks for the comments! Hope to be a lot more regular from now on.
@ Rsubras
I agree :) More meaningful.
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